It’s very easy to carry around regret, guilt, or shame, and yet forgiving yourself is often such a challenge. In fact, the ability to forgive yourself is the fundamental step that most people miss, and they can’t move forward without it. A 2017 study, for example, found that the ability to forgive is associated with greater life satisfaction, and that spanned all age groups. 

What Is Self-Forgiveness?

The researchers behind a 2018 study defined self-forgiveness as a positive attitudinal shift in the feelings, actions, and beliefs about the self. This feeling followed a self-perceived transgression or wrongdoing. Forgiving yourself may help restore a positive sense of self and help protect you from the toxic effects of shame, guilt, and regret. The antithesis of self-forgiveness, then, is self-loathing or berating the self, according to therapists.

People have a tendency to think that they need to be perfect at all times. This frame of mind is a self-protective mechanism because there are consequences when you are not perfect. The beauty of human beings is that they are imperfect, but the thought of being imperfect is quite scary. Forgiving yourself ultimately comes down to exploring what happened and processing feelings associated with negativity. The following tips should help you on your path to self-forgiveness. 

Reframe How You Think About Your Mistakes

If you want to forgive yourself, you have to reframe the way you think about your mistakes. The average person thinks in polarities, i.e. successes versus failures, strengths versus weaknesses. These polarities can coexist, but you have to figure out how to make that happen. Swirl your brokenness with beauty and shift away from that polarized way of thinking. Ultimately, you’ll have a richer understanding of the self. 

Don’t “Should” Yourself

It is easier to berate yourself than to forgive yourself. Another common practice is “shoulding” yourself, meaning that you focus on what you should do or should have done. When you think in that way, you judge yourself unnecessarily and limit the potential and work you can do to think openly. Don’t judge or should yourself; rather, take the time to learn from past mistakes and use those experiences as tools for positive change. 

Take Responsibility For Your Actions

When you start to reframe how you think about your mistakes or actions, you can embark on the journey of the four R’s of forgiveness. The first R is responsibility, because in order to forgive, you have to first take responsibility for your part in the story. This can be very difficult and scary, but it is quite heroic to take responsibility for yourself. Unfortunately, taking responsibility also opens up the doors to remorse and regret, which brings us to the next point.

Don’t Deny Remorse Or Regret

The second R of forgiveness is remorse because feeling remorse is very natural after taking responsibility. Remorse is actually how you move toward handling the situation in a healthy way. It’s how you “build the muscle of self-forgiveness,” because you allow yourself to feel the pain. You cannot simply let go and forget because it is healthier to sit with your feelings and process them. When you encounter remorse, don’t shy away; rather, allow the pain to move through you to come to a resolution, which can ultimately reduce the chance of that mistake happening again.

Rectify Your Wrongdoings

When you take responsibility and embrace remorse, you can reach the third R, which is restoration. Restoration is about apologizing to yourself and making amends. That can occasionally mean asking friends for forgiveness, but also supporting your remorse with a change in behavior. Part of forgiving yourself may involve righting your wrongs with others. Even if your forgiveness doesn’t have to do with anyone else, the relationship with yourself often needs restoration. This is an important step on the road to self-forgiveness because you ultimately shift the narrative from a broken place to one of evolution. Nothing can change if you just leave it the way it is!

Find The Lesson

The final R of forgiveness is renewal, a process during which you can grow having learned valuable lessons about yourself. Self-compassion experts state that renewal is about understanding what led to your mistake and making the conscious effort to prevent it from happening again. Take the time to consider if environmental factors influenced you at the time. Were you under a lot of stress or did you act out in an irrational way? Look beyond yourself and how you interpret the situation. Sometimes, you realize that you didn’t make a mistake at all. You were just trying to live the only way you knew how at the time. Now that you know better, you can act differently moving forward. 

If you find that you still need assistance after these steps, consider speaking with a mental health professional. Nobody needs to struggle alone, so reach out to someone and talk about your difficulty or inability to forgive yourself. There are countless resources that can help you move forward in this life, so use them if you need to!

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12 steps to being happy:
1. Be optimistic.
2. Follow your gut.
3. Own yourself
4. Make enough money to meet basic needs
5. Treat your body like it deserves to be happy.
6. Stay close to friends and family
7. Be compassionate.
8. Have deep, meaningful conversations.
9. Find happiness in the job you have now
10. Smile
11. Forgive
12. Make friends.

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Let’s be real for a second and say that we’ve all made the resolution to lose weight or eat healthier in the New Year, but it didn’t quite stick past January. The intention is there, but the follow through is not. Considering that about 80-90% of people run out of steam by February, it is safe to say that the classic “lose weight, eat better” mindset for the New Year is outdated and boring.

Listen, we’re all for getting healthy by way of exercise or diet, but this is the same resolution every single year. By show of hands, how many people fall off the health wagon each year? Since we can’t see you we are going to assume that your goals did not last. Sorry for the pessimism and doubt, folks, but facts are facts and statistics don’t lie. We aren’t shaming anyone because getting healthy is hard, but most people go about it the same way each year. This is why we recommend changing the game to shake things up for 2020. Start the new decade with a bang and focus on creating resolutions that are off the beaten path.

Note: Always remember that you can get healthy any day of any month of any year. There is never a bad time to get healthy, and you shouldn’t limit yourself to achieving this goal just because of a new year. Additionally, things don’t happen overnight and habits take time to form. Let the process happen naturally and don’t beat yourself up for resolutions that take time to show positive results.

Get Rid Of Clutter

If you haven’t actively searched for it or used it within the past year, it’s time to get rid of it. Be it an old pair of pants or a line of string lights that has been broken for years, get rid of clutter to help reduce stress and improve organization and cleanliness for 2020.

Cook At Home More Often

A home-cooked meal is magical and establishes more togetherness between friends and family. Eating out all the time is great if you want to drain your bank account, but it doesn’t always provide the healthiest of food choices. Invest in your health by researching recipes and learning to make them. You’ll find that cooking isn’t as difficult as you thought it was.

Be Kind On Social Media

It’s so easy to fall into the negative black hole that is social media. Negativity is one of the easiest reactions, and algorithms can learn to send you negative stories based on your activity. Promote more kindness on the Internet and don’t let hate be your motivation for interacting on social media.

Let Go Of Grudges

Speaking of negativity, there is no room for grudges in 2020. Grudges are outdated and only contribute to stress and buried feelings of anger inside. Forgiveness is what it’s all about, so take the high road to invite positivity into your life.

Reduce Your Waste

The average American produces about 2,000 pounds of trash every year. That’s disgusting, folks. Things will inevitably end up in the trash, but you can reduce your waste in simple ways, for example, using old T-shirts as rags instead of going through paper towel rolls. Switch to reusable grocery bags and stop buying bottled water. These things make a difference!

Take The Stairs

Yes, elevators and escalators are convenient, but challenge your self and climb those flights. It’s good for you booty and quads. That is all.

Travel Without Posting On Social Media

Be in the moment and don’t stream the moment for all to see. In the age of “it didn’t happen unless you post about it,” it seems silly to not post on Instagram or tweet where you are eating, hiking, swimming, etc. Resist the temptation to post! Snap a photo, but keep it for your memories and then tell people about your experience when you return home.

Read More Books

Reading boosts brain health and can reduce stress. That’s why people recommend curling up with a good book and a cup of tea for stress reduction! Aim to read one book every two months. If you find it difficult to sit down with an actual book, download an audiobook and listen to them during your commutes or in your free time.

Stop Gossiping

You don’t want to be that person. That person isn’t healthy. Spread positivity and love, instead.

Do Random Acts Of Kindness

We get so caught up in making resolutions for ourselves that we often forget about the needs of others. Random acts of kindness can happen in so many different ways, and the world can always use more kindness. Volunteer at a homeless shelter, donate blood, participate in a beach cleanup, or buy a meal for a homeless person. Kindness is contagious, so get out there and spread it.

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Heart disease kills one in four American women, making it the one killer of women in the United States.

More women experience heart disease than men. It’s harder to diagnose, because the symptoms present differently, and more subtly, than in men. In fact, nearly 66% of women who died of heart disease had no previous history of symptoms.

Causes and Risk Factors

Four main risk factors are identified in heart disease among women:

• Metabolic – high blood pressure, high blood sugar and high triglycerides, belly fat
• Stress – mental stress, anxiety and depression can contribute to heart disease
• Lifestyle – smoking increases the risk of heart disease
• Hormonal – low estrogen levels, especially after menopause, can lead to increased risk of heart disease.

Women who are African-American, Hispanic, Caucasian, American Indian and Alaska Natives suffer from heart disease more than women of Asian descent.

Other risk factors

• Diabetes
• Smoking
• No physical activity
• Hypertension (high blood pressure)

Symptoms

A heart attack indicates heart disease. Symptoms of heart attack are:

• Chest pain
• Shortness of breath
• Numbness in the limbs, especially the left arm
• Nausea
• Dizziness
• Sweating
• Fatigue

Heart attacks can be caused by blood clots forming in the arteries, restricting oxygenated blood reaching the heart. As a result, cells in the heart start to die. If the attack is strong enough, or the heart disease severe enough, it can cause permanent heart damage.

Heart Diseases

There are more than 50 types of heart disease. The most common type is coronary artery disease.

Coronary artery disease is the hardening of arteries that supply blood to the heart. It’s known by these names are well:

• Arterioschlerosis
• CAD
• Heart disease
• Ischemic heart disease

The hardening is created by a build-up of plaque along the interior walls of the arteries. As the plaque builds up, artery walls become narrower, which decreases volume of blood flow. Decreased blood flow means less oxygen to the heart.

Many women also suffer from angina pectoris, a stinging pain in the heart when the heart doesn’t get enough blood.

The Symbolism of the Heart

Metaphysically speaking, the heart is the seat of our true inner-self, the doorway of spiritual illumination, the center through which we express our capacity for deep feeling, nurturing, unconditional love, affection, forgiveness, compassion and sensitivity for oneself, others, and life. Our fears of being hurt, insecurity, feeling unloved, broken-hearted, arrogance, insensitivity, intolerance, misplaced affections and desires; long-held hurt, bitterness, anger, hostility, rage, excessive anxiety and stress, heavy-heartedness, resentment, and lack of forgiveness can block the flow of vitality in the heart area.

There are a lot of unhealthy hearts in America. But believe it or not, hurt is actually good for the heart. You can’t know love without knowing pain/hurt. Pain causes the heart to evolve and to blossom. However, for many, pain just leads to hate. While hate is detrimental to the body, it is simply one extreme of the polarity. Hate and love are the same thing in nature or essence, simply differing in degrees, just like ice and steam, both of which are water but differing at degrees. That’s why there’s such a thin line between love and hate, because they are in essence the same thing. Duality exists in all things.

When your heart has been emotionally wounded, the pain stores in the tissues of the heart and can manifest as the physical heart pain that doctors call angina.

Love is the best elixir for a healthy heart and the best medicine for a broken heart.

Natural Healing For Heart Disease

Exercise 30 to 60 minutes a day, at least 4-6 days a week. If you don’t have the time in one block, you still get the same heart health benefits when you break it up into 15-minute segments.

Quit smoking. Enough said.

Maintain a healthy weight. People with a body mass index (BMI) of 25 or higher show higher rates of heart disease. Losing at least 15 pounds can reduce the risk of heart disease.

Reduce anger and emotional stress. Negative thoughts and emotions place the heart under tremendous duress, and contribute significantly to heart disease. Surround yourself with positive people, create a healthy, positive environment where you work and live. Visualize a healthy future, and be kind to yourself with your thoughts and actions.

Get enough sleep. Sleep deprivation is proven to take a physical toll on the body-and the heart is no different. Get at least 6-8 hours of restful sleep each night to ensure the healthiest body possible.

Dietary Intervention

Eat a diet low in saturated fat, salt (sodium) and cholesterol. Add foods rich in omega 3 fatty acids, such as:

Seeds, spices and vegetables

• Flaxseed oil
• Flaxseeds
• Chia seeds
• Sprouted radish seeds
• Walnuts
• Basil
• Dried oregano
• Grape leaves
• Dried marjoram
• Walnut oil
• Spinach
• Spearmint
• Capers
• Wheat germ oil
• Alfalfa sprouts
• Cauliflower
• Arugula
• Lettuce (butter and bibb lettuce have the highest levels)
• Peppermint
• Kidney beans
• Red bell peppers
• Mustard seed
• Pinto beans
• Broccoli raabFlaxseed oil and flax seeds have higher amounts of omega 3 fatty acids than any fish source. Eating fish isn’t necessary to consume this vital nutrient.

Fruits

• Blackberry juice
• Raspberries
• Blueberries
• Strawberries
• Guava
• Lemon
• Acerola (Indian Cherry)

Dherbs Solutions

Dherbs.com products that can help include:

• 10 Day Heart Cleanse
• Cardiovascular
• Cholesterol Formula
• Circulation Aid
• Heart Tea

Thank you for reading!

This article is compliments of Dherbs.com.

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Love is a requirement or prerequisite for healing. Forgiveness and love go hand-in-hand. Many people get and remain sick because they refuse to forgive other people and to give love to self and others.

At Dherbs.com, we believe all disease can be naturally healed. With God (or the higher power of your beliefs), all things are possible. Although it may not always be easy or obvious to find/understand, God has provided a solution to every problem.

You will not heal if you don’t forgive. You can’t heal if you don’t love, especially if you don’t love yourself.

Some scientists believe that love raises the body’s pH, whereas hatred and all other negative emotion lower the body’s pH and make the body acidic.

So what do you want? If the answer is healing, then your solution is simple! Since you desire healing, now you know what you must do: forgive all who may have harmed you (as well as yourself) and love yourself.

Many people have difficulty in healing even with the use of herbs and natural modalities and the reasons are because they have blocked their minds and hearts. They have failed to learn the lesson the disease has brought and is conveying; they have failed to release all negative energy from them; they still have fear, especially fear of not being able to heal; and lastly, they focus on the wrong things-they focus on what they “don’t” want rather than focus on what they “do” want.

Instead of wanting healing or optimal health and wellbeing, they simply want to not have the problem any more. The word “not” is negative and therefore not processed by the Universe, so in essence, the Universe only hears the negative and it gives the person more of what they really don’t want.

Signs of negative thinking are:

• Personalizing everything
• Filtering what you hear from others
• Magnifying risks, drawbacks and failures
• Expecting the worst
• Believing there is no “gray” area.

The Power of Positive Thinking

You attract what you give, think and believe. If you want health, then you have to believe it’s possible, and live your life in love, offer forgiveness and focus on positive outcomes. The Law of Attraction is always at work in your life.

Known benefits of positive thinking are:

• Lower rates of depression
• Increased life span
• Stronger immune system
• Improved heart health
• Better coping skills

You can recover from any disease as long as you have the proper mindset and are willing to forgive and love.

Thank you for reading.

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When life hands you lemons, make lemonade. This adage is old yet still relevant and meaningful.

The importance of having a positive attitude cannot be underestimated. There will always be tough situations in life. Sometimes the best-laid plans can go awry. Sometimes consequences result from unforeseeable circumstances. Sometimes every possible thing that can go wrong goes wrong, usually in the pouring rain. And sometimes you just have a really bad day. These situations highlight how easy it is for obstacles to manifest themselves in your day-to-day life. Yet they also remind us the importance of maintaining a positive attitude.

Choose to be positive

Being positive is choice and decision. Make the decision to live your life this way. You too have that choice and a can also make that decision if you haven’t already. It would be in your best interest too if you made that decision to consciously be positive. If you don’t think so, give it a try for 20 days (or 3 weeks) and see what happens.

Positivity offers many benefits and dividends to be reaped over the years of your life. Positivity raises your vibration. It enhances your aura. It attracts people to you. Positivity makes you a bright light that shines in the midst of the darkness of negativity.

To be positive means to be:

• Constructive in intention or attitude
• Showing optimism and confidence
• Showing pleasing progress, gain, or improvement, with no possibility of doubt
• Clear and definite

Attitude is a major component of success. Attitude, along with aptitude, determines altitude – how high one will fly in life. Having a positive attitude can help you be successful in every aspect of your life, especially in love, family, business, and social standing.

Just like positivity, optimism creates magnetism. Pessimism repels people. Nobody really likes to be around a pessimistic person. There’s a big difference between a pessimist and an optimist. A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity whereas an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.

Doubt of positive outcomes and brighter days, realizing that doubt is the subconscious will to fail in many regards and respects.

Become clear and definite about your purpose in life. Become faithful and trustful in your abilities to live out and perform your life’s higher purpose.

Tools to be positive

Create strategies to be as positive as you can. For example:

• Give thanks every day
• Give back by doing a good deed every day
• Let go…Forgive those who have hurt you
• Ask for forgiveness of people you’ve hurt
• Appreciate what you have
• Compliment a stranger
• Take in the scenery…even if it’s a flowering plant or tree in your garden
• Donate something
• Volunteer
• Sing your favorite song as loud as you can
• Smile whenever you see someone

These may seem really basic, but they also really work.

Defeat negativity

Positivity neutralizes negativity.

If person says something negative try to say something positive in response to what was said, and after a couple of rounds of going back and forth and matching negativity with positivity, the negative person would retreat.

The negative person will always retreat because they can’t feed on negativity. Soon, it was impressed upon the negative person not to talk to you, at least about negative stuff, because you don’t feed their negativity.

You defeat negativity in people by remaining positive. It eventually became very easy too because in being and remaining positive. Simply be yourself…it’s the easiest thing to do.

Dherbs Solutions

• Nerves Cleanse & Regimen
• Liver, Spleen & Gallbladder
• Liver, Gallbladder & Spleen Tea
• Anti-Psychic Attack Spray
• Love Spray

Thank you for reading!

This article is compliments of Dherbs.com.

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What gives power to a human being? Is it the money, status, bank balance, position or fame? Well actually none of these. These things may give an illusion of power temporarily, but in reality it takes away our power as we become addicted to it.

The actual power of our soul lies in the forgiveness that comes out of genuine feelings. One may say it is easier said than done. Well, it is true to some extent. It requires lots of guts and inner strength to forgive others.

But do we have any other option? No, our soul wants to be empowered by freeing itself of all the negativity. When we free ourselves from all the resentments, hatred, guilt, and regret; which in turn is possible only when we forgive (whether that be ourselves or someone else). By sending this positive energy that “I forgive myself and forgive all others” to our mind, body and soul, we free ourselves from the cause and effect of karmas. Our body also starts removing the toxins which were created as a result of negative emotions.

When we experience the feeling of forgiveness inside, we become receptive to creating miracles in our lives. This is done because when we free others or ourselves, and learn the lesson from the situation or the person, then we become ready to move on in life, and universe either changes that situation or gives us new opportunity to work with. We become a magnet for attracting all positive situations.

The law of attraction then applies: you will attract according to the vibes you send to the universe. If the vibes are positive then positive people and positive situations are attracted, and vice versa. Forgiveness removes all the negativity and fills us with peace, happiness, content, and harmony. These positive vibes that our soul experiences now attract positive experiences, instead of negative ones.

But we have to forgive, in order to experience it. Start forgiving everyone including yourself, genuinely, with the understanding that everyone is a part of bigger plan and have come to earth just to gain experience (either good or bad). See through their souls shining brightly and in the process of evolving. Free yourself, by freeing your mind, body and soul from the negative effects of the fear, hurt, anger, and guilt.

Start today to become a better human being – forgive yourself first and see the miracles happening in your life.

Monika Sakhuja is an instructor in theta healing, a Reiki practitioner and instructor of manifestation & abundance. She takes healing sessions, teaches theta healing and also conducts workshops on power of mind.

Follow Monika Sakhuja
www.divinecreation.in

Dherbs Solutions:

• Full Body Cleanse
• Full Body Cleanse Tea
• Alternative Diet and Lifestyle Manual

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