Brown Hit Rihanna

[Djehuty]

Thank you NEWDEEP!

You know, we must tackle the situation INDIVIDUALLY because we can't force others what we ourselves can force ourselves to do. All we can do is lead by example, being the change we so desire to see in the world, or in this case, in our people and community.

[plzno]

This documentary is kind of in line with what Djehuty mentioned. Its a little long but very interesting:

Diary of a tired black man

Part 1

http://www.zshare.net/video/55177976fbd24445/

Part 2

http://www.zshare.net/video/55177940658cea20/

[naskat]

I really do believe people like the drama, I think it makes them feel good to get some kind of attention.

[ThatGirl]

Djehuty, you didn't really touch on my post, so I am not sure why you addressed me at the end. You wrote about the history behind the breakdown of Black male-female relationships. I posted a link about the reactions to Chris/Rihanna's very public 'showdown'.

You didn't touch on the general apathy that people seem to show towards Black female domestic violence victims in the 'community'. You didn't touch on the commentors (usually Black) who rushed to Chris' defense based on the RUMOUR that she punched him in the face. These same people who looked for every media tidbit they could find to justify Chris' behaviour, and to throw Rihanna under the bus........

I hope Rihanna doesn't go back to crazy Chris. That boy needs counselling.

I found a link to the comedienne Roseanne's site where she posted this
"chris brown's lies and excuses
make me want to beat the crap out of him...he uses the language of the perpetrator just like every sleazy bastard who ever smacked his wife, kid mother or girlfriend around uses. you dirty bastard, I hope you go to prison for ten years. IT'S YOUR FAULT, ASSHOLE! as for all the mealy mouthed hollywood and music scene chicks that can't bring themselves to condemn a misogynistic bully, let me say this: your time as whores for propaganda is ending, bitches. "

I find it interesting that a White woman could feel so strongly about this, but alot of these celebrity 'sistas' are like......    

Ha ha!

[Djehuty]

Djehuty, you didn't really touch on my post, so I am not sure why you addressed me at the end. You wrote about the history behind the breakdown of Black male-female relationships. I posted a link about the reactions to Chris/Rihanna's very public 'showdown'.

You didn't touch on the general apathy that people seem to show towards Black female domestic violence victims in the 'community'. You didn't touch on the commentors (usually Black) who rushed to Chris' defense based on the RUMOUR that she punched him in the face. These same people who looked for every media tidbit they could find to justify Chris' behaviour, and to throw Rihanna under the bus........

I hope Rihanna doesn't go back to crazy Chris. That boy needs counselling.

I found a link to the comedienne Roseanne's site where she posted this
"chris brown's lies and excuses
make me want to beat the crap out of him...he uses the language of the perpetrator just like every sleazy bastard who ever smacked his wife, kid mother or girlfriend around uses. you dirty bastard, I hope you go to prison for ten years. IT'S YOUR FAULT, ASSHOLE! as for all the mealy mouthed hollywood and music scene chicks that can't bring themselves to condemn a misogynistic bully, let me say this: your time as whores for propaganda is ending, bitches. "

I find it interesting that a White woman could feel so strongly about this, but alot of these celebrity 'sistas' are like......    

Ha ha!

I mentioned you only as messing with you, but if you want a response to Black male abusers (of Black females) ......

[1ofakind]

http://www.tmz.com/2009/02/19/rihanna-photo-face-beating/

This picture has been circling around the internet of what her face looked like after the beating.  Don't know if it is 100% though.

[Djehuty]

THAT GIRL: It’s sad; but even some of these comments reflect how the black community supports bm abusers.

DJEHUTY: Yes, the Black community does support bm abusers. Is not the Black community SICK AS HELL? Why be shocked when the Black community supports Black female abuse when this kind of abuse is glorified in rap music, especially gangster rap music?

"Reached back like a pimp and straight slapped the ho!" - Eazy E

"So I grabbed the stupid bitch by her nappy ass weave ..." - Eazy E

I ain't saying this abuse is right or can be justified but I understand the roots of it. Black females (being yang in nature due to external circumstances) are quick to run up on a man like they themselves are men. It's part of our collective dysfunctionality. Remember the early scene in the movie "Love and Basketball" after the two little lovers kiss before going to school and they consequently have a disagreement about what bike is to be rode on now that they are girlfriend and boyfriend and the little Black boy pushed the girl down and they start rolling over on the lawn and fighting? It starts early, Beloved! Most of our Black girls are disrespected as little girls and they grow up having to be just as tough as boys (to defend themselves). I told you above (unless you ignored the fact for some reason) that the problem goes back to BLACK MALES! And part of the reason for this wholesale disrespect and abuse of Black females is the culture has no rituals, no rituals for Black manhood and no rituals that lead to the reverence and respect and protection of the Black female.

In many Black homes, children (siblings) had to watch their mother and father argue and then fight, so little Black boys picked up on this and learned that when you get tired of arguing with a Black female you simply slap and beat the shit out of her; and little Black girls come to accept this as natural (a natural reaction). And it didn't help for this same Black mother and father to fight and then a few hours or days later to be back in the sack fucking like jackrabbits making "ghetto love" which the children heard through the thin walls of their projects apartment. I'm quite sure this was very confusing to Black children. They learned (subconsciously) that first you argue, then fight, then you make up and have sex. Hmm! The origins of "break up to make up sex?" You tell me!

Many Black females learned that in order to have passionate sex, they had to first talk shit and start a fight, a la the scenes in the movie "Baby Boy!" So Evette tells Jodie "I hate you!" "I hate You!" "I hate yo black ass!" And what happens moments later? Jodie is upstairs in the bedroom fucking the shit out of Evette and Evette is greatly pleased. Straight dysfunctionality! And just think how many Black females conceive in this kind of sex and circumstances!

See sis, we have to look at the roots and origins or our behavior!

TO BE CONTINUED!


 

[Midnight]

This right here is so true. I dont want to no longer be a participant in the phenomenon no any longer. Just talking from my own experiences but I want to get over the mentality and fear of being hesitant and sceptical of pursuing a black man because I dont want to be manipulated, controlled, abused or feel pressured into having sex too soon. I realized it's me and I do attract them but some of them do wear good disguises.

[naskat]

this is so true. i grew up in an abusive home, and it is very hard for me to see things as they are, i see everything as a attack on me, because i was constantly attacked , and asked to explain myself as a child. so, now as an adult i am learning to hear what someone is saying first before becoming responding. it is somewhat embrassing to me because i never knew what a functional relationship looked like, i had always to explain or defend myself before getting beat. this type of violence is very typical in some black homes, and sometimes the women in turn beat on their children or mentally abuse them after their men beat them up. this also leads to aggression, depression, and drug use by the children. it took me four years to get from under my mother's mental control, and now i am working on my negative behaviors.

[Djehuty]

Continuing ....

And who are MOST young inner city Black males' idols and role models? ANSWER: P-I-M-P-S!!!! Most want to be a pimp. And how do pimps treat their women? Answer: like shit! Pimps also practice dysfunctionality of relationships. It's called "Kick and Kiss." Kick a bitch's ass and then you show compassion (kiss) to her is how the game goes. I didn't make this up. Kick and Kiss was a well known saying back in the 1960s and 1970s.

Also, what kind of guy do most of these inner city Black girls desire? ANSWER: A Thug! Is a thug known for his compassion? Hell naw! Like pimps and other abusive males, thugs will go up side a female's head real quick.

And let's not forget that many Black females MISCONSTRUE punishment for love and concern. This is a pathology! My cousin would get beat down by her thug husband (yes, she straight married the dude) and sport a black eye and have the nerve to tell the family that this is how Mark (her thug husband) expresses his love for her. Again, a pathology!

Many young sistahs get sexually abused so much and at such young ages, they think that this kind of sex (which is abusive sex) is the only kind of sex and they end up wanting and desiring "it" hard and rough! One young sistah told me (in platonic conversation): "I like it rough!" "Pull my hair and spank me hard on my ass!" Thug dudes have no problem with this request but a young brutha with a head on his shoulders will have objections to this pathological demand and this is why "bad boys have all the fun and get all the babes." A square dude won't rationalize such actions, so he'll come up short because this young female will straight 86 him for a thug who can "hit it right!" Our young females embrace "thug passion!" For many, it's all they know! Many know how to fuck, but they don't know how to make love. They don't know what real intimacy is.

And because many young Black females act like hoes (because they are conditioned to believe they are supposed to act this way), they end up getting treated like such! I don't think we can focus on the astronomical numbers of young Black males being preoccupied with pimps and being a pimp without taking into consideration how many young Black females are subconsciously or outright overt with being preoccupied with being a hoe or a slut (under the banner of being a "gold digger", "call girl", "model", and/or "dancer"). I tell young cats to be weary if a young girl or woman tells you she's a dancer. Dancer is a code word for "stripper" or "pole dancer" as well as "lap dancer." Seriously! Hell, you better ask her what kind of dancing she does and where does she dance at. If she tells you she only dances at night, well, it's pretty much a wrap. Baby doll is shaking her ass before a crowd of horny men and swinging on and sliding down poles. And I'm not knocking any female who does this because to each his/her own. If I ain't paying your rent I can't tell you jack shit!

Also be weary if she says she's dancing her way through college -- only dancing to pay her tuition! That's bullshit in many cases! She's dancing because she likes too and/or she likes the money to finance her lifestyle.

"Model" is the new term for "porno actor." Many adds will state: "Looking for Models!" Yeah, right!

The game is so damn deep Eazy E may be right in that: "No change may come because the problem is too deep!"

Too many young Black girls desire athletes (who are filled with misdirected aggression), comedians with strong wanna-be pimp tendencies, a la Katt Williams, Eddie Griffin, et al., and studio gangster rappers who are very appropriately starring in Hollywood movies - which is very befitting of a "STUDIO" gangster.

Sorry, but these particular Black males supra don't make up the upper echelons of accomplished Black males. Let's be real here! But our sistahs don't look for qualities in these males. They look for the quantity of the paycheck. Most of these sistahs have to know these cats are no good, but I'm sure they get caught up by the money (the Jigs make) and the prospects of getting knocked up by one of these jigs is appealing for purposes of receiving child support.

If so many Black males have a desire to be a pimp, then accordingly, a lot of Black females out there have a desire to be pimped and thus to be a hoe! Law of Attraction is still in effect here. That which is like unto itself is drawn! Period! We have to deal with this for it takes two to Tango.

[curtisduncan]

Greetings to all,

My perspective on the situation relates to the Law of Attraction.  As a person who has been "abused" or created abuse in my reality, I know that my vibration I was offering creating that circumstance.  In sense, it was my own self abuse (thoughts of self hatred, judgment, doubt, etc) which created that.  I also think that beliefs play a big part of situations like this too.  So often times, we think that our beliefs are truth when everything outside of us is really an illusion but it is our observation of something which actually creates it or makes it appear real (Observer effect known in Quantum Physics).  Basically our beliefs act as a literal filter through which reality is formed around us but even then this does not make "real". It is just our reality or what it is observed.  In the infinite field of possibilities through which all things come, any and every reality can or already does exist but maybe our belief that is missing or not there keeps up that way.  I hope I aint getting to scientific and left brained on yall. Some "Black" women (not all) have a lot of beliefs (limiting) about men and/or Black men

Niggas aint shit
Niggas want to control you
Men are dogs
Niggas is triflin
Ain't no good men available
Niggas is either married, unattractive, or gay

All of these different phrases and more are beliefs (limiting) which thereby creates these realities into those people who believe them.   The other night I was watching Katt Williams and he mentioned that women who say niggas aint shit are just talking about THEIR experience, it does not make it true.  When he said that I was thinking damn, that is accurate in the sense that if an individual believes that (which is neither right or wrong) then that is their experience via the Law of Attraction.  So I guess the solution is in my perspective for all people when it comes to relationship is to be aware of what we are thinking or believing about so called reality and maybe develop some more supportive beliefs.  In my opinion as always, the relationship with self will always be reflected in the outer too.  The beloved Rihanna may have a lot of success and what not but no amount of anything external can ever silence the inner judge or critic.  Shoot sometimes, it will increase the inner critic and give it more means through which to criticize.  By the way, the inner critic is little voice that says such things as:

You are ugly
You are not sexy
Your hair is too nappy
Men will never like you
You are not good enough
You did it wrong and always will
You got to be punished
You are too fat
You are a failure and always will be


As far as Chris Brown, the brotha was probably frustrated and maybe he believes that he justified in taking his resentments and frustrations out on women or other people.  Maybe he believes that women can't be trusted so you gotta control "em" and put "em" in check.   I honestly do not know what is going through the brotha's head but many people believe that if they are frustrated or angry then they are justified in yelling, screaming, or physically harming another person.  I am not saying this is right or wrong it just is but I do know that our egos will tell us that we are justified in putting our negative emotions out onto someone else because THEY are too blame.  My perspective is that there no such thing as justified anger or any other negative emotion.  It is never wrong to be angry nor does it need to suppressed but if we are experiencing anger then that is that. We are all free to experience anger but it does not mean that our negative emotions have anything to do with is outside of us.  I have this insight now after being a very hostile and angry dude for awhile but I was limited or victimized in the sense because my joy or freedom really was dependent upon so-called reality.  Another person would "make me angry".  For me, that meant I was at the mercy of individual and this individual could literally block my being in joy.  Many people also think by changing the reality (leaving the man) you can your experience in relationships.  The root issue are the beliefs though so if those are not addressed then the so-called abused person will create another abusive relationship in their experience.  I KNOW from experience and I have heard plenty of stories of people who create abusive relationships their whole lives.  Just my perspective, aint trying to be right about anything. To sum it up, our beliefs create drama or happiness in our lives and by changing your beliefs you can change your life. I actually recorded an audio session today on the Law of Attraction and relationships. You can check out it here

http://www.blogtalkradio.com/curtis-duncan/2009/02/20/how-to-easily-attract-your-ideal-mate

I love yall Dherbs family, and I am grateful to connect with you all on the Internet level, peace  

[Djehuty]

THAT GIRL: That support comes in many guises.

DJEHUTY: It sure does and surprisingly it comes from many of the same gender as Rihanna! We saw this with R. Kelly and Mike Tyson! A lot of Black women are programmed to stand by their guilty sons. You can't justify guilt!

THAT GIRL: I haven’t read many comments here that showed sympathy for Rihanna or suggested she get therapy.

DJEHUTY: In my opinion, commercial-based therapy is bullshit! But yes, it's better than not doing anything! But these days, folks like Chris and Rihanna need someone to break down higher law for them and help them with past life regression, chakra balancing, etc. No matter what Rihanna said, Chris had no right beating her. There's no excuse (if you're a real man). A few chicks stole on me and I didn't trip because my father taught me "why hit em' back when you know you can hurt em?" Why prove what you already know? I never hit a female! I'd just put em' in a grip lock or something while they tussled to get loose but couldn't. I showed my strength in this capacity. They eventually had to give up and when they capitulated I let em' go. LOL!!! Fellas have to learn to cool a lady down. It's really easy to do. The most important thing is to stay calm. Show reserve! A lot of females find this attractive too in a male.

[newdeep]

This discussion is very disheartening!  What can we do to fix this problem with the self-esteem of young Black boys and girls.  I am a woman and I feel we have to help these girls starting about kindergarten age and if they are in negative and dysfunctional environments, try to mentor them and help them develop their femininity and true worth.  But I thought about it.  What if I did start a campaign like that?  What would they go home to? What if they told their mothers what they were learning and just happen to say "Well, Momma, you know you shouldn't let "Joe" beat on you like that! Momma you're worth way more than to be treated like that! That girl's mother would probably say something like: "Oh now you goin' to these damn meetings and you think you better than somebody, now! That mother would probably be so intimidated by her own daughter gaining some knowledge and love for herself that she wouldn't be alllowed to go back.  And for the deal, she'll probably get up in my face, too!  I don't know what we're going to do.  All I know is that I teach my own teenage daughter about her self-worth and real strength of a Black woman, just as my mother taught me.  My cycle of life was different because I was raised in the love and admonition of my mother and father.  The cycle continues because some of these mothers can't teach their children anything because they don't know themselves and some of them, don't want to know.  It's too hard and too much work to break the cycle.

[Djehuty]

LOL!!! Though disheartening, it is very real! And you gave yourself insight to the consequences of what would happen if you tried to help young girls in school, because like you said: what are they going home to? It all starts in the home! You can't teach veganism to small students only for them to go home and be force-fed meat, dairy, refined junk and other harmful things and probably beaten for attempting to teach their parents to eat right (healthy).

I remember while a Black Muslim and trying to help local young gang-bangers and ignorant ass Black parents (usually single mothers) would say: Oh no! You get away from my son with all that Moozlem stuff! Leave my son alone! LOL!!!

So when someone would say, hey Earnest, ain't that messed up how Tra got killed? I'd think about how I tried to enlighten Tra but his ignorant ass and unconscious mother prevented him from being enlightened because she herself refused to be enlightened. So when Tra died and his mother acted a fool crying and wailing and falling down to the grown and stuff, it didn't faze me one bit. Hell, you reap what you sow and if you plant ignorance you reap the consequences of it.

My uncle Jerry who I no longer speak to, had the nerve to say "I feel sorry for Jabir's daughter!" after my mother's funeral simply because of my way of living but about 2-3 years after that, his step-son Kwan got shot up in a Cutlass at a drive through fast food place in Compton, California. My words to the family was: "ignorance is as ignorance does. Jerry thought he knew better than me due to his seniority on earth but seniority don't have shit to do with wisdom and the Bible bears me witness with the little 12 -year old Jesus character breaking off the wise elders."

Years lived on earth does not guarantee wisdom!

I remember when my older brother would tell me to have my own children when I tried to help his son. LOL! His son is state property RIGHT NOW (after bouts with smoking weed and gang-banging) and you think I care one bit? Hell no! Because I never forget what people tell me and if you are not careful I'll remind you and rub it in and make you feel worse than you do because you DESERVE it for being stupid, dumb, blind, and unconscious AFTER light was shone your way!

After I warn you, to hell with you! I respect free will, even the free will to be a bumbling idiot! And I don't care who you are!

They all said I was mean, harsh, and cruel, and didn't have a heart and that I would be fixed (I guess by God) but NOW all of em' are breaking their necks to contact me and locate me but they can't. All they can say is like in the movie "Menace II Society": "Damn, we never thought he would come back blasting (in life) like that! LOL!

Success is the best revenge!

[naskat]

Yes, it all starts from home. I am sorry to say this but some black parents are very ignorant and dumb! My husband and I are on the FBD, and we were eating salad for lunch, so his moms said " How you gonna get full on all that rabbit food!" You would think that she would complement us on trying to improve our health, but she keeps laughing at us as she eats her overcooked, and MSG laced meat. Then she thinks we are starving our son since we decided to stop giving him meat. She thinks its ok to give a little toddler a lot of bread, since she thinks all toddlers crave for it. She said " All them herbs, you need to go to the doctor... It's all in your head!"

Also, children's self-esteem is greatly dependant on how their parents treat them, and what they say to them. For instance, wherever I questioned my mother she would tell me "Shut up!Children are only supposed to be talked to... don't talk when grown folks is talking." Then my other family who was from down South would always call somebody a nigger, " That little nigger get on my damn nerve's!" " That dumb nigger!" Even today I hear parents say " Shut up ya kids get on my motherfucking nerves!" " Shut the f up, u stupid mtf!" When my mother called me stupid as a child it deeply affected me, i really felt I was dumb and a bitch as she so said. As a child I was naturally inquisitive,psychic, and creative so I never understood why they talked so badly about people, and to me. I always daydreamed of escaping my nightmare. My mother would tell me " I only hit you because I love you" I was like wtf? How you gonna love me and hit me too? Now that I am an adult I have realized that she has a sickening possessive love for me, I don't even thinks she really loves me she just wants to control me. I have cut her off  a few times when her neurotic ways cause stress to my life, but because she's my mother I unconsciously haven't been able to fully cut her off form her toxic ways. She use to call me like 20x a day, and leave me a few angry voicemails as to why I wasn't picking up my phone.

So, as a child and teen I was very depressed, I could not understand why I couldn't have a normal family. My cousins said we had a generational curse idk. But, I have learned now form reading the forums, that I had a choice. So many times I ran away only to be coached back home, I had a choice to seek out therapy, and leave my violent home. I now realize that from these experiences I attracted more negative experiences by my low self- worth, and negative thoughts a in my late teens. I am now learning to realize that my negativity and anger at time attracted to me people who neither loved nor respected me.

Back, to Chirhianna, Rhianna grew up with a crackhead father, and Chris saw his mother get beat down from his stepfather. So they both come from troubled homes.They probably never knew how to express their anger in a nonviolent way. Also, they may not know how to have a functional relationship.  She probably has a low self-esteem, that shows itself by being a controlling and jealous girlfriend. Maybe Chris doesn't know how to express himself in a healthy way, and only knows violence as a means to expressing his anger. I am not saying what he did was right, both these kids need help.Parents fail to realize when then fight and make up they are leaving an imprint on their children.